Full Transcription
Nick:
To keep my job, and be able to keep my job for so many years, it’s been about adopting with my vision loss.
Jeff:
Blind Abilities presents essential worker, Nick D’Ambrosio.
Nick:
When the whole pandemic started, the store was in a frenzy. There were moments of high anxiety and high stress where I said to myself, “If there is no regulation, and if things do not change, I am not comfortable.”
Jeff:
Remaining independent for 22 years on the job, and remaining essential to his community throughout the epidemic.
Nick:
I never suppressed the feelings of fear that I have, and when it did become overwhelming for me, I went to the back, I took a breather. I acknowledged that this is getting a little too crazy, and I’m frightened, and a little bit not secure in my environment, and needed to take a break. I told my managers about it, and then, of course, changes happened, and things got a little bit safer.
Jeff:
For more podcasts with the blindness perspective, check us out on the web at www.blindabilities.com, on Twitter at @BlindAbilities, and download the free Blind Abilities app from the App Store and the Google Play store, That two words, blind abilities. And enable the Blind Abilities skill on your Amazon device, just by saying enable blind abilities.
Jeff:
Now, without further ado, here’s Nick D’Ambrosio.
Nick:
And then people are like, “But sir, the line is in the back.” I keep telling him, “Yes, but I work here.” There’s always a sigh, and everybody’s freaking out that, oh my God, the blind guy’s actually working at the pharmacy. That’s been weird.
Speaker 3:
They say we’re a dying breed. They pull themselves up by their own bootstraps. They never talk about an honest day’s work until the work is done. Welcome to the Blue Collar Blind.
Jeff:
Welcome to Blind Abilities, I’m Jeff Thompson. Today, we’re talking across the border, we’re going up into Canada, up to Montreal, and we’re talking to Nick D’Ambrosio.
Jeff:
How are you doing, Nick?
Nick:
Not too bad, Jeff. Thanks for having me on.
Jeff:
Now Nick, this is quite unique. You’re legally blind, visually impaired, blind, however you want to phrase it. With the epidemic going on right now, we’re all on lockdown, but you are an essential worker.
Nick:
Absolutely. I’ve been working at a drug store for the past 22 years, so this has been an interesting time. I’ve never seen anything like it before, I’ll tell you that much.
Jeff:
Get in line, there’s a lot of people, this is all brand new territory.
Jeff:
But Nick, 22 years working in a convenience store at the pharmacy, that’s a feat in itself.
Nick:
I like to think of it, it’s been a progression. When I did first start, I had a lot more vision. As time goes on, you get pretty familiar with your surroundings, your coworkers. I like to say that I work in a little island, and that’s my little world, it’s almost like my own apartment per se. So, you get used to the products, get used to where you are, and where you’re situated, so it becomes more of a familiarity around me.
Nick:
It is quite difficult to steer around customers, and deal with certain things. But, with assistive technology, I’ve adapted as time went on because, for me, to keep my job, and be able to keep my job for so many years, it’s been about adopting with my vision loss. That’s been more the challenge. I can’t say that people at work were not helpful, but they were also not dealing with my problem. I had to go outside the box, and start to figure out things on my own, and how to keep my job. So far, so good. With technology, I am keeping my job, and hopefully I can be working there for a few more years, for sure.
Jeff:
You know, Nick, I’ve known you for years. I remember you telling me the stories about how you didn’t want to use the cane, then you started to accept the cane. You started to accept all the trappings of being visually impaired, even from recognizing products visually, to now you’re using an app on your iPhone, reading barcodes.
Nick:
Well, exactly. There was a panic, at one point, because I would have little signatures on products that I would zoom in with the little vision I have to get a landmark. Kind of like a landmark that we use on the streets, I would use a landmark on a product, see maybe a star or something. Then, when that started to disappear, I realized I cannot … I may be able to distinguish products within the same family, like within the Tidy family because I can feel the bottle, but I couldn’t distinguish the different scents. Then, I said, “I really can’t do my job.”
Nick:
Using a barcode now, I personalize everything. It took a couple of weeks, but as I was doing work, working with someone there, I would tell them, “What’s this product?” I would scan it, personalize it, so for the next time I wouldn’t need assistance. A lot of it, also, was memorization of my area, and knowing where products go.
Nick:
So, I need to be focused at every moment, and be aware of my surroundings, and actually pay very close attention, and actually do as well as a job … Of course, there will always be some times where I will ask for help, but with technology, it has really come a long way to help me do my job, as independently as I want to do it.
Jeff:
With this vision loss, the progression, you’ve been able to adapt to, and adjust to it. But now, we have the epidemic hitting, and social distancing. Now, you were talking about how you like to touch the products, you stock the shelves, you obviously touch … you unbox the products. Your hands are all over, your mitts are everywhere.
Jeff:
But then again, you’re in the aisles, there’s people around you. This has probably been quite an adjustment for you.
Nick:
When the whole pandemic started, the store was in a frenzy. There were moments of high anxiety and high stress where I said to myself, “If there is no regulation, and if there is no structure, or things do not change, I am not comfortable.” You have to understand that I have no vision to my right, very little, I’m legally blind, so I just see shades. It’s very difficult for me to see anything remotely close to me, so I wanted to give up.
Nick:
As time went on, I went to my manager, and then things started to progressively change. I think, right now, as the present moment we’re speaking right now, there are limited people that can enter the store, so that makes my life a lot easier. Social distancing is still a challenge, only because I can’t see the person, but because of the low traffic in the store, it’s doable at this point. I do have something on my shirt that provides indication that I am visually impaired, so there is a big yellow tag falling off my collar saying I’m visually impaired so people, hopefully, can pay attention. I, of course, have high acuteness on what’s around me, and my senses, as well as trying to be aware of things at every moment.
Nick:
It is a little bit safer, I find, compared to when it was at the beginning.
Jeff:
You know, Nick, day in, day out, there’s got to be a level of fear. How do you cope with that?
Nick:
That’s an interesting question, because throughout my years at the pharmacy, I had to do social distancing, in a sense. While I’m doing my work, I’m like a horse race with the blinders on, I am so focused on my task at hand of picking up my stock, using my phone, figuring out what I have in my hands. And then, with my memory, going to the area, and putting the stock away. Throughout all of this, I have to be careful on where I’m going, for my safety, and also not get into someone else’s space as well.
Nick:
Before, if I’d bump into somebody it was okay, but now it’s not okay, there’s that social distancing. So, there is a little bit of fear that comes with it now, that I didn’t really have before. Before, there was a fear, but it’s like, if I bump into somebody, I walk very slow. My vision, I do have some shade perception, so I see shades and people, but my peripheral is not very strong, so I might bump into somebody. It’s happened before, but now it’s more urgent of a situation if I do, and I might spook somebody, or I might get spooked if someone is in my zone if I don’t see them, so fear is still constant.
Nick:
But, there’s a saying that a coward and a hero both face fear, it’s how you deal with it, and I never suppress the feelings of fear that I have. When it did become overwhelming for me, I went to the back, I took a breather. I acknowledged that this is getting a little too crazy, and I’m frightened, and a little bit not secure in my environment and needed to take a break. I told my managers about it, and then, of course, changes happened, and things got a little bit safer.
Nick:
But, for me, the fear factor is acknowledging it, and trying to work with it instead of suppressing it. I guess, that’s how I cope with things. Again, everyone’s going to be very different, and fear can be paralyzing to some, and some people can deal with it, and move on from it. There’s not a right or wrong answer. I think the best way is to at least acknowledge that you have the fear, and not suppress it. And then, try to find ways to work with it, in the long run.
Jeff:
What is your day like? I mean, you get up, you go outside. We’re all on shutdown, we’re all locked down here in Minnesota. But, you go outside, you have to take transport. Then, from transport, you have to get to the store. And then, you go into the store. Describe that process? Basically, the changes that you’re going through today, with that process.
Nick:
Well, the first change, which has been a great change, is my transport because now they’re only allowing one person per cab so I’m getting to work in record time. The stores now are opening much later, so instead of opening at 8:30 like they usually do, they open at 10.
Nick:
Usually, when I get to work around nine o’clock, there’s a lineup. I have to cut through the lineup. It’s funny, because every time I walk through that lineup … Again, social distance is difficult, so I’m coming, I know there’s a lineup, I hear the ramblings, the talking. I say, “Sorry, I’m coming through, I’m coming through.” Then, people are like, “But sir, the line is in the back.” I keep telling him, “Yes, but I work here.” There’s always a sigh, and everybody’s freaking out that, oh my God, the blind guy is actually working at the pharmacy, so that’s been kind of weird.
Nick:
You get Purelled at the front, I usually get to the back. Usually, clerks and other managers set me up with a truck, either with stock, put it in the middle of the aisle where I work. From there on, I open boxes for a couple of hours until, actually, the people come in. Because due to the COVID-19, we’re opening later so it gives us a little bit more time to get stock on the shelf, paper, toilet paper. In some cases, get it on the shelf right away. So, it gives me time to catch up on my work, get stuff that’s a little bit difficult to get to the shelves, there’s some products that I might have difficulties with.
Nick:
Then, from there on, do orders, I usually do orders with a coworker, and we go through the sections. That’s been interesting because we don’t really do the social distancing because we have to go through 30 feet of section in order for the stores. But, we do protect ourselves. My hands are very raw from washing them so often. I think we’re all conscious, and we trust each other that we were taking the right steps to stay safe. As we speak right now, it is mandatory for us to wear masks at the store as well, so measures are being taken daily.
Nick:
That’s pretty much a day in the life of Nick. It’s a lot of stuff on your feet, a lot of working, a lot of moving around. And, a lot of assistance that I sometimes need to get to maneuver around, but for the most part, like I said at the beginning, it’s like a little island so I know every nick and cranny, and every turn, and cut in the store. Or, at least in my area.
Jeff:
What kind of products? It’s obvious, the toilet paper, probably, and the Purell, and stuff like that. But, let’s just start with, do you see repeat customers? Are you starting to see patterns here? Or, what products are a surprise to you, that are disappearing quick?
Nick:
Well, for the most part, the Lysol wipes, the Purell. Toilet paper was always an oddity, to me. Javel has been going really, really fast.
Nick:
One thing that baffled me the most is anything with the word anti-bacterial gets swiped off the shelf. That doesn’t really, necessarily mean it’s better than regular soap. A lot of people want to get products with the word Lysol in it, and I understand that’s important but there are a lot of other products that can actually clean counters, and do just as good as a job as a Lysol wipe. There are products like Hertel with Javel, or using Javel, but some people are … I don’t know if I want to say misinformed, or just panic shopping, so they hear certain things and they come to the store.
Nick:
Gloves, of course, masks, and a lot of that stuff, we don’t have inventory for it. It’s been short for many weeks on end, so that question is like a Groundhog’s Day. It’s like, “No, we don’t.” “When do you think you’re going to get it?” We don’t know, because we’re not even aware ourselves, from day-to-day, what the warehouse will give us. We place an order, but what we get are two different things at times.
Jeff:
That’s great. So, your transport, you just get in it. Are you wearing gloves, when you go outside?
Nick:
See, the gloves is an interesting topic because I really never felt the need to wear gloves. A lot of people, customers even told me that, “Why aren’t you wearing gloves?” I said, “Look, if I wash my hand constantly, and I don’t touch my face, I don’t understand the necessity to wear gloves.” Because if you’re wearing your gloves and then you touch your face, it’s exactly the same thing as if you were touching something, and touching your face without your gloves. So, I didn’t feel that there was any added protection by wearing the gloves.
Nick:
Also, another factor remains is that there’s a special way to take off surgical gloves. If you take them off like a pair of mittens, you’re really re-contaminating your hand again. So, I always felt that hey, I’ve got to discipline myself not to touch my face. Yes, I may be touch many surfaces, but as long as I don’t touch my face, and I go back when I’m going to my lunch, or going to my break, and wash my hands properly, I’ll be fine.
Jeff:
I mean, five days in, every day you’re doing this. I’m pretty sure you’re pretty cognizant of your hands.
Nick:
Absolutely. They are a little bit raw, and maybe that’s the only benefit to wearing gloves is maybe saving your hands a little bit. But then again, as soon as you take off the gloves, you’d have to wash your hands anyway. So, I’m not telling anyone not to wear gloves, if they feel it’s an added protection, that’s great. But remember that if you are wearing gloves that you still need to wash your hands once you take them off because you still need to touch the gloves.
Nick:
It gives them a little sense of, I call it, false security I guess it would be.
Jeff:
Mm-hmm (affirmative). How about masks?
Nick:
See, the mask situation at the pharmacy’s been kind of odd, because it’s only been since this Monday that it’s been mandatory. Now, some of my colleagues, younger ones at that, were staring to wear them before I did, before they became mandatory.
Nick:
Again, as reports came on that it could be, because of the social distancing, I was actually getting a little preoccupied because I wasn’t keeping social distancing because of my vision loss. I said, “Maybe I should be wearing a mask.” Now that I am wearing a mask, my concern is that adjusting my mask with my hands, touching my face, when before I wouldn’t be touching my face. Now, the mask is there for one reason, to protect others not yourself. I don’t have the COVID, at least I don’t have any symptoms, but I’m protecting others, I’m not being protected from them.
Jeff:
Our governor was saying that wearing the mask, it may not be helping the best of science and all that, but it does help from you spreading it a little bit. But, it also gives, like I you said, that false sense of security, it also keeps you aware of social distancing because you’re wearing it, it keeps the awareness of why you’re doing, what you’re doing, and to respect others, so that’s really good.
Nick:
I really believe that if you do social distancing and wash your hands, and don’t touch your face, I think those are the keys. Now, everything else you do on top of that is just gravy. You want to wear a mask? Fantastic. You want to wear gloves? Fantastic. But, if you follow the steps of social distancing and keep away, and also don’t touch your face, and wash your hands, your pretty safe, in my estimation. Again, I’m not doctor, and I’m not here to preach, but that’s just the way I’m looking at things.
Jeff:
Oh yeah, we’re all adjusting, it’s all new territory. I’m just glad that they’re starting to come down with some guidelines for people to follow, because otherwise, like the younger ones who were wearing the masks, maybe it was trendy, maybe they were fashionable, the new fashion. I’m going to get some Blind Abilities masks. No, I’m kidding.
Nick:
There you go, you could put the BA right next to it.
Jeff:
BA!
Nick:
There you go.
Jeff:
It is true, once you have the guidelines, and once you have leadership actually that people are turning to, they all start to understand a little bit more about it. I like that they’re limiting how many people can be in the aisles, because then people are aware that … You have the pharmacy there, that’s basically a big reason why you guys are open.
Nick:
Absolutely. The thing is that there are people that respect these “laws,” and some that don’t. But, for the most part I would say the majority of the population is respectful, we are all trying our best. At one point, we were taking temperatures at the entrance, with the Purelling of the hands.
Jeff:
Really?
Nick:
Yes. The pharmacy started implementing an infrared thermometer, and so when we would walk in, I remember my colleague said, “Nick, can I take your temperature?” I’m like, “Well, how are you going to do that?” I lifted up my jacket, and they just pointed at my wrist, they pointed the infrared at my wrist and they basically got a temperature.
Nick:
Now, is this fool proof? No. It just takes the body temperature, and there’s been some information that it’s not super accurate in the sense of … temperatures fluctuate from person to person, and people have different body temperatures. Some people are a little bit extra hot, some people are a little bit extra cold, some people have a higher temperature in the morning, or a lower temperature in the morning. But, it does, if someone is really, really has a real fever, it will detect that person’s super hot.
Nick:
We also implemented of not using carriages. Some people got annoyed in the store, but that was also because we didn’t want people to linger around too much.
Jeff:
Oh, yeah.
Nick:
I know that the grocery stores still have to, but you’re dealing with bulk. With a pharmacy, yeah you can deal with bulk at times, you can order a lot of things, but we were trying to say, “Look, this is a drug store, pick up a few items and let’s keep this moving.” Because a lot of people that are waiting outside need drugs, and also we have a post office so people are waiting to pick up parcels as well. As you can see outside, it started to get a little complicated because we had three different lines. One for the store, one for the post office, one for medication. To orchestrate all of that is still difficult now.
Nick:
Just to add more chaos to the whole situation, what’s happening now is that a lot of what they’ve implemented is online shopping in the drugstore. So now, through the website, you can go to the website or call us and say, “Look we need, this, this, this, this, and this,” and the clerks would get everything, then bring it to the front cash. Then, the person would come, they’d leave their name, and then we’d get their credit card, or their debit card, without them coming in the store. All of this is being done to just really alleviate the traffic that’s going around the store, and make it also more convenient for people, instead of waiting in line for maybe 20, 30 minutes.
Jeff:
Yeah, we’re all adapting to the challenges that we’re facing, and it’s going to change next week. I mean, if we said that there’s a certain guideline right now, that could change in a heartbeat, but it’s all for the good, and I’m glad you guys are getting some guidelines. You’re staying safe, that’s good, I like it.
Nick:
One thing I just would like to mention is just be friendly to the clerks, to the pharmacists, for any intents and purposes, anybody that you go in the front lines, it’s stressing for us. For me, I can say I’m a little bit over the stress and the anxiety for now, but when you’re in the moment, and you’re there at the beginning, I started to feel a surreal feeling about the whole thing. I don’t know, but as time went on, I started to get a little bit more worried about my situation and saying, “Should I really be putting myself in this type of danger, considering my condition?” But, as time went on, I really felt that the guidelines that I’m following are not fool proof, but pretty safe.
Nick:
So, just be aware of who is serving you, and what they’re doing on a daily basis to get the products or the services to you. Because for me, I am visually impaired, I am a little bit nervous or anxious at times, but even my coworkers who are perfectly healthy, young adults are worried. I remember one of the young clerks that worked with me saying, “Look, I don’t want to be here, I can make money tomorrow. I want my health.” That comment stuck with me. It’s like, here’s a young kid who was actually scared to come to work that day, and he said, “I can make money another day, it’s not important to me right now.”
Nick:
You have to understand that the people that are out there are doing it for the greater good, and we’re providing a service, and just be nice to all of us if you can. I know that maybe stress and anxiety might be following a lot of people, but take a deep breath when you walk in that store, and realize what’s going on.
Jeff:
Big thanks goes out for you, and everyone else that is manning the stores, keeping the stocks, keeping the supply lines moving because people need this stuff. We’re all adjusting to it. The front liners out there, it’s not just … I don’t want to take anything away from anybody, we’ve got the hospital workers, all the people that make that hospital work, the janitors down to the cleaners. But, when we look at the supply line, the products and stuff, you’re there.
Jeff:
I heard a story that some people run right into the danger, right into the fire, right into the hospital, some people never thought twice. I was at the grocery store, and there was a manager walking around, talking to all the workers, and walking through the people. Distancing, and this was weeks ago when everyone was getting a feel for what this newness was going to be like. But, you’re doing it every day, Nick.
Jeff:
Thank you so much for sharing the story about this. Stay safe, stay well, and stay informed.
Nick:
Thanks a lot, Jeff, I appreciate your time. To everybody out there, eventually this will … Oh, there was one guy who told me a famous saying, “This too shall pass.” I don’t know, maybe his name was Jeff Thompson, I’m not sure.
Jeff:
You know Nick, honestly, I don’t know what it’s like, I don’t know what my stress level would be like if I had to do what you are doing, and you’re doing it. Not because you’re vision impaired or anything like that, but you’re just doing it, you’re doing your job, and you’re keeping those supply lines going for a lot of people, so I’m sure they respect that blind guy that butts in line every day.
Nick:
That’s right. I appreciate you giving me the time to talk about, a little bit, my experience. Everybody, stay safe, and thanks a lot, Jeff. Remember, this too shall pass.
Jeff:
Yeah, that’s right. Thanks, Nick.
Nick:
Take care.
Speaker 3:
They say they’re a dying breed. They pull themselves up by their own bootstraps. They never talk about an honest day’s work, until the work is done. Welcome to the Blue Collar Blind.
[Music] [Transition noise] -When we share
-What we see
-Through each other’s eyes…
[Multiple voices overlapping, in unison, to form a single sentence]
…We can then begin to bridge the gap between the limited expectations, and the realities of Blind Abilities.
Jeff:
For more podcasts with the blindness perspective:
Check us out on the web at www.BlindAbilities.com On Twitter @BlindAbilities
Download our app from the App store:
‘Blind Abilities’; that’s two words.
Or send us an e-mail at:
info@blindabilities.com Thanks for listening.
send us an email at info@blindabilities.com.
Thanks for listening.
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